For many years, guys and gals growing up getting their sex cues from Hollywood romances didn’t have a clue about how to kiss. That changed with more realistic kisses coming to the movies, but now the pendulum has gone beyond that point with most movie kisses looking like the two combatants are consuming each other for lunch.

This has caused more than a few folks to fail to understand how a kiss should work, and what methods might be employed to arouse the ardor in a lover with a simple kiss.

Unlike today’s movies, you shouldn’t jump into your lover’s mouth like a high-speed chase through a tunnel. Instead, build her anticipation by kissing all around her face. Begin your kiss slowly and gently with emotion and sensitivity.

First, kiss without using your tongue, slightly open mouthed, with sweet breath. Only after this initial modest kiss should you start to get serious, and only when your lover indicates that she’s ready for more (usually by using her tongue or by opening her mouth more widely to invite your tongue in).

From this point, there are a variety of ways you can continue this interplay:

• Take your lover’s bottom lip between the two of yours and suck gently.

• Trace the outline of your lover’s lips with the tip of your tongue.

• While kissing, lick you lover’s teeth with your tongue.

• To increase sexual excitement, make your kiss wet.

• Wrap your lips around your lover’s tongue and suck passionately.

• Use hot or cold liquids to create erotic sensations.

• Kissing her eyelids and ears.

The key to success in all this is to go slowly, and to keep things modest especially with the first few kisses. Be sure to follow your lover’s kissing techniques and emulate them. Little by little the two of you will learn what works best.

Then put your knowledge to good use, bringing her slowly closer to consummating your encounter.

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There seems to be a pretty even split between the people who think masturbation is “acceptable” and people who don’t. It seems that family, religion and society have far too much to say about whether a person should show that intimate love for themselves.

Some people feel that masturbation causes all sorts of problems – mentally, emotionally and physically. Do you think that’s true?

There are many reasons why people may choose to masturbate – whether they are in a relationship or are single. How many of us have times where you just want to feel that rush of adrenalin, the building and spreading stimulation as you feel the excitement spreading throughout your body – starting between your legs or maybe around your anus and building more and more as your hands or fingers move to the places on your body that make you feel so good. You feel your pulse or heart beat increase, maybe your temperature begins to rise… it may be one of those times when you’re in a warm bath – the water gushing into the bed or maybe the water is rushing over your body in the shower – and your hands working your body into a familiar frenzy. Closing your eyes, you think of your lovers mouth on your body, their hands kneading your wet backside, and they move to cup your breasts in their hand….

Do you like to fantasize while you masturbate? Does that make you a bad person? Or do you find that it makes you feel closer to your partner even when they aren’t with you? There are so many ways to look at the time you spend by yourself sexually.

Let’s take a look at an article I read about how many women masturbate. I would love to hear what you think. Do their numbers sound right to you?

92% Of Women Masturbate: How Often Do They Do It

A new study reveals 92% of women regularly take time out to masturbate, a huge jump from the findings of previous studies (74% in 1979 and 62% in 1953).

The Gossard Big M Survey interviewed 1,000 women, ages 18-30, and their answers indicate that not only do 9 out of 10 women play with themselves, two-thirds do it three times a week. The study refers to these as “sessions,” which we can assume doesn’t refer to the number of orgasms achieved, but rather, the time spent achieving them. ‘Cause you know that if you have one, you stick around for more. Orgasms from masturbating are like Payless shoes: Once you get the first pair, you get the second for next to nothing.

Going just from the published findings of this survey, it’s impossible to determine, on average, what percentage of the week is spent flying solo. So maybe we can make this a group effort? I’ll start off:

- I masturbate, on average, 5 days a week.
- Each “session” lasts for about 12 minutes, with a minimum of 3 orgasms a session, and a max of 13. (I don’t know if these means I’m really good at it, or really bad.)
- I sleep, on average, about 6 hours a night, so I’m deducting that from my “week.”

Variables:
- I work from home, so I have more opportunities to masturbate on a whim than most women.
- I use a Hitachi Magic Wand, which is indeed magical, so the act is easier. However, I also make up for time saved by being greedy with as many orgasms as possible.

So, if my math is correct, then:
7,080 minutes of my week, I am awake.
60 minutes are spent masturbating.

Which means:
.84% of my week is spent masturbating.

But also, of the days I masturbate:
1,080 minutes of my day are spent awake.
12 minutes are spent masturbating.

Which means:
1.1% of my day is spent masturbating.

Feel free to leave your results in the comments.

92% Of Women Like To Go Solo [The Sun]

Earlier: 10 Pop Songs About Female Masturbation

This was originally posted at http://jezebel.com/5107639/92-of-women-masturbate-but-how-often-do-they-do-it and you should definitely check out the comments

In our 20s we experiment, spread our sexual wings and figure out some things about our sexual lives. Some people marry in their 20s while others wait till their 30s or later – that is part of our sexual journey.

Some of the things that are fairly usual for people and couples in their 30s, include:

• Experimenting with blindfolds, spanking and typing up a partner – some couples may opt to try more involved BDSM while others focus on more vanilla activities.
• Many couples hone their oral sex skills in their 30s – both giving and receiving. I would think this is a very good thing
• As women begin to get more comfortable with their sexuality – they are likely to have more orgasms
• Couples often have young children in their 30s and children can definitely disrupt or limit a couples’ sex life. It is very important for couples to put forth the effort to maintain their sex life and their time together – intimate or otherwise – for the health of their relationship.
• Many couples have had sex outdoors by their 30s – maybe in a car, in a secluded spot or possibly in their yard. There are many options – have you had sex outdoors?
• Straight women are likely to have gay male friends. Funny, I was having that conversation with a 16 year old female friend today and she totally agreed about having gay male friends. From what I’ve read, there is a definite symmetry between the minds of straight women and gay men, so it makes sense that they are friends.

These are only a few of the thing that may be true about your sex life in your 30s. What are some ways you care to share?

Our perspective and attitude about sex will likely change depending on our personal situation and our age. Some activities are more common in our 20s, 30s or 40s.

What are some of the things you tried in your late teens or your 20s? Here are a few examples:

Thinking About Sex A Lot - For men, it seems that most men think about sex a lot. That can be triggered by seeing a hot woman, hearing a sexy voice, watching porn, seeing a centerfold, or even a stiff breeze. But seriously, most men do think of sex on a very regular basis and especially in their 20s. I think if many women are honest, they think of sex a lot too – maybe not as often as men, but its still something women definitely think about.

BiCurious and Same Sex Experimentation – When you’re young it can be a good time to experiment with the opposite sex and sometimes with the same gender. I’ve heard all kinds of stories about people experimenting in college or at parties when they are young. Even if you know that you’re straight, you may just be curious. What would it be like to kiss and maybe make out with another woman? What would it be like to kiss another guy? Your 20s, may be the time you decide to see what its like. Another time can be after being in a marriage for years and then wondering what you missed by being straight.

NSA and Friends with Benefits – Your 20s can also be a great time for no strings attached sex and friends with benefits. You may feel you’re too young to be married or you just aren’t ready to be married, but you still want to have sex – and these are two option that men and women chose, while they are looking for that special someone or while they want to stay single.

Various Sexual Positions - Your 20s can also be a great time to try a wide variety of sexual positions. You are young, full of energy and likely more limber and flexible than you will be in the 30s, 40s and beyond. This could be a great time to try different types of sex and different positions. See what appeals to you and what you like with a partner. Your preferences could change as you get older and with different partners, but that’s all right. You keep things interesting and you can keep discovering new things that you enjoy.

Threesomes and Moresomes – Most men and many women have thought about or fantasized about being in a threesome or other group sex. You may feel your 20s are a great time to experiment with sex with multiple partners. A threesome or other group sex can be more enjoyable and less emotional when you aren’t in a relationship – so your 20s could be a great time to try sex with a man and a woman, two men or two women. This is an article I wrote for couples considering a threesome and this is an article I wrote for an individual considering a threesome with a couple.  Both include important things you should consider before having a threesome.

Sex with An Older Partner – For people in their 20s with limited sexual experiences or who are very curious, they may want to have sex with an older man or woman. An older partner will likely have more experience and can teach you new things. So, this could be a great time to hook up with an older man or woman. With the current mentality, it is becoming more acceptable for a younger man and an older woman to get together, so this can be a likely option for men or women.

These are just some of the activities and attitudes that can be normal for people having sex in their 20. What other things would you include?

There are many things to consider when you have sex for the first time and when you’re having sex at a young age. That is content for another article, but if you would like to talk about concerns or question, feel free to click the “contact me” button on the left side of the page or email me at lovecoachjourney@gmail.com

Defining The Desperate Woman

First, let’s clarify our terms: I define a desperate woman as having low self-esteem, believing she has no choices and must settle for whatever follows her home.

But my new friend Cecilia, 25, single and gorgeous, adds, “A lot of desperate women have unrealistic expectations. They are waiting for the perfect man, the man with a lot of money, the Prince Charming to sweep them off their feet. He doesn’t show and they feel desperate.”

Good point. Desperate is a state of mind, not the reality of how a woman looks or what she has to offer—but a mental state influenced often by unrealistic expectations and throwback societal attitudes about the comparative worth of male and female.

Why such prolonged desperation in women?

Everything I’ve read, says most (if not all) men fantasize about threesomes – preferably with two women. I think many women like the idea of a threesome although they may hesitate to say it.

Let’s start at the beginning – you fantasize about being in a threesome, maybe with a couple of men, a couple of women, a man and a woman or maybe more people.  Think about multiple hands, arms, legs, butts, breasts and so many other parts — where would you start? Not to ruin the fun, but before you join in, you should consider some things.

Here are some possible types of people you could join in a threesome –

• It could be a committed couple – married or not.
• It could be two “friends with benefits”.
• It could be a friend of yours and a friend of theirs.
• It could be two people you know.

Each of these scenarios has pros and cons for the single person. Why are you interested in being in a threesome?

• A very common reason is to fulfill a fantasy
• A common reason is because you’re curious
• Explore and learn more about yourself and your sexuality
• Learn new sexual skills and try new sexual activities
• To get more attention from the same sex, the opposite sex or both
• Experiment with bisexuality, heterosexuality or homosexuality
• Learn new ways to please your partner
• Discover new things that please you
• You may want some sexual variety or just more sex
• To be a voyeur and watch other people please each other
• To be an exhibitionist or have people watch you
• Liberate yourself from the usual social and religious constraints

Here are some things you need to consider before getting into a threesome –

• Are you afraid? If so, this isn’t the time to try a threesome.
• Do you feel anything for the people involved? Jealousy is very common in threesomes.
• Are you participating to please someone, but not yourself? Your decision to do anything sexually should be because you want to do it.
• What are your motivations and the other people’s motivations? If any of you have bad motivations or a hidden agenda, the threesome is likely a bad idea.
• If you hope to make a lasting connection with a married man or woman through a threesome, you will likely be disappointed.
• Have you already dealt with any hang-ups you have about sex or your sexuality? If not, you need to do that first.
• Are you prepared for any complicated emotions and feelings that are likely to come up? There can be complications, so you need to be prepared.
• Are you worried about someone “out-performing” you? You need to deal with these feelings of inadequacy before participating.
• Are you concerned about the other people’s motivations? If so, don’t proceed until you feel their motivations are good.
• Can you trust the other people who are participating in the threesome? For safety sakes and your peace of mind, don’t participate with people you cannot trust.

Most people will tell you threesomes can be very enjoyable, but with the wrong people or the wrong motivations, it can be a negative experience. Review the possible reasons you want to be in a threesome and make sure you’re prepared, physically, mentally, emotionally and sexually. Do everything you can beforehand, to ensure you have a hot, sexy and very satisfying threesome.

A love and relationship coach can help you prepare for new sexual activities in a relationship or can help you to prepare for a relationship. Feel free to contact me for more information at lovecoachjourney@gmail.com

1 cup of gossip

1/4 cup of rumors

9 lbs of jealousy

Mix well and cover in lies. Roast for as long as you lack self esteem

I’ve heard that one reason younger men want to date older women is because there is less drama with these women.

That should be an interesting tidbit for younger women. They could ask themselves these questions –

• Do you create unnecessary drama in your relationships?
• Do you create drama with friends, family and dates?
• Do you get jealous with any dates and boyfriends?
• Are there reasons why you feel jealous of any men?
• Do you start or believe rumors with no substantiation?
• Do you listen to gossip and jump to conclusions about boyfriends?

Rumors, jealousy and gossip can kill a great friendship or relationship. Low self eteem and low self confidence can make you more likely to create drama in a relationship. In stead of acting out and causing drama – you should consider going directly to your boyfriend or girlfriend and talk to them about the issue. Never start a conversation by blaming them or being negative and attacking them – instead, be positive and find out if the concern is true. Often gossip and rumors are unfounded and can destroy a relationship for no real reason. So – wouldn’t it be better to give your partner the benefit of the doubt and get their side of the story.

Keep in mind that several things a healthy, loving relationship must have are: love, trust, two people who love and respect themselves and open honest communication. If you have those things in your relationship, you should also be able to head off any destructive rumors, gossip and jealousy before they can create any lasting problems.

What are some situations where your relationship was ruined by rumors, gossip and jealousy?

If you battle these problems and want to improve your relationship – feel free to contact me about how relationship coaching can help you. lovecoachjourney@ gmail.

Here is how I would describe it and feel free to customize the approach to fit the things you and your partner enjoy.

Many people are partial to having their neck kissed, so you can start with gentle kisses on her neck. You might want to kiss her so lightly that it almost tickles her. Does she like you to nibble on her neck, nuzzle your mouth and lips against her neck? Whatever technique you know she likes – would be the way to get started.

Reach around her neck with your hand and slide your fingers into her hair. Does she like for you to run your hands through her hair or to pull her head closer to you? Just go with your gut and if/when you hear her moan, know you’re doing great.

Next move your mouth to her ear. Almost no one likes their partner to be noisy or excessively wet when they are kissing their ears, so be quiet and be careful not to be slobbery with her. You can tick your tongue into her ear, but watch her reactions to see if you’re doing too much or if she enjoys it.

With the tip of your tongue, lick her ears. You can run your turn along the edge of her ear. It can be nice to alternative your tongue on her ear and blowing softly into her ear. If she likes nibbling, try soft nibbles on her ear lobe and you can alternate that with suck on her lobe. You could suck on the lobe and brush your tongue against the lobe.

Be creative and use your imagination. Some people love eargasms but other people don’t – so be very aware of your partner’s reactions and any sounds she makes. It is very possible she will like some of the things you do and not others, so pay attention to her body language, verbal and non-verbal communication. All these reactions help you know what she likes what she doesn’t. Have you tried something similar that worked well? Feel free to share.

Do you want more kissing tips – visit http://shedyourinhibitions.com/kissingreport, enter your name and email address, then you will ercive the link to download your copy.

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